I've studied over 200 kids—the ones with high emotional intelligence have parents who do 7 things early on

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Individuals who can effectively handle obstacles with confidence, cultivate significant connections, and pursue lives of purpose.

—and from practicing healthy habits with my own child — I've discovered seven key strategies that these parents adopted from the start.

They grasped the significance of remaining quiet.

They gave their child space to work through their emotions and trust their own instincts. When their child was upset, they sat quietly next to them, providing comfort without saying a word. Allowing children to be in silence can help them better understand and think about their feelings.

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They often referred to emotions in their early stages and frequently talked about their own emotions.

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They apologized to their child.

They demonstrated to their child that making mistakes is a natural part of life and taking responsibility for those mistakes is a sign of strength. Apologizing helped build trust and showed respect, making their child feel appreciated and valued. This also taught their child how to model empathy and repair relationships.

4. They didn't enforce phrases like 'please,' 'thank you' or 'sorry'

This may seem unusual, but they realized that kindness and respect can't be learned by command. Instead, they acted it out themselves, trusting their child to pick up on the behavior. If their child forgot to say thank you, the parent would say it for them, confident that the lesson would sink in over time.

This requires a lot of courage, but as a parenting coach, I've never instructed my 6-year-old to say please or thank you. Now he uses these expressions all the time on his own – because he hears me use them.

5. They didn't brush off small concerns

They took their child's concerns seriously, whether it was a lost toy or a problem with a friend. By acknowledging their feelings, they showed their child that emotions are important. This helped their child feel valuable, safe, and respected in their thoughts and feelings.

6. They didn't always provide solutions

The most effective way to teach decision-making skills to children is for them to make their own choices. Instead of solving problems for them, ask, "What do you think we should do?" This approach fosters critical thinking, confidence, and self-reliance.

7. They embraced boredom

By allowing their child to get bored, they enabled them to become comfortable with periods of stillness. This led to the development of creativity, self-regulation, and problem-solving abilities. Their child learned to appreciate their own company and find happiness in everyday moments, such as gazing out the car window, rather than constantly needing a screen.

Teaching Your Child Emotional Intelligence

  • Setting a good example: Express your feelings freely, apologize when you're wrong, and show compassion and understanding in your interactions.
  • Make sure to acknowledge and validate your child's feelings, no matter how insignificant they may appear, and allow them the room to work through those emotions without rushing to resolve or downplay them.
  • Promote problem-solving by asking open-ended questions rather than providing all the answers.
  • Allow individuals to encounter periods of quiet or monotony in order to foster their imagination and self-control.

First and foremost, focus on establishing a relationship based on mutual respect and trust – because emotional intelligence begins with feeling secure, appreciated, and comprehended.

Reem Raouda is a certified conscious parenting coach, a mother, and creator of BOUND — the first and only parent-child connection journal designed to help develop emotional intelligence and self-esteem in children. She has transformed hundreds of families through her courses , coaching There is no text to paraphrase. Please provide the text you would like me to paraphrase. Instagram .

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