Being a mom of 2 with almost no income during my divorce was terrifying. These are the steps I took to rebuild my finances.

Table of Contents

• Jolie Steele is a mother of two children, who are 11 and eight years old.
• She knew she wanted a divorce, but was hesitant to take the plunge due to her financial situation.
• She organized popup events at her house and rented out a room in an attempt to revitalize her career.

This essay is based on a conversation that was recounted to me by Jolie Steele There is no text provided. Please provide the text you would like me to paraphrase.

Around the age of 22, my ex-husband and I drifted apart over the course of more than 12 years of marriage. Ultimately, our differences were too great to overcome and we ended up getting a divorce due to irreconcilable differences.

In our home, I owned a consignment store, but I wasn't generating any significant income. For a period of time, I wasn't certain I could consider ending the marriage due to the overwhelming financial challenges.

It's been two years since then. Since then, I have been committed to improving my financial situation after going through a divorce.

I've drastically reduced my expenses

Our agreement included spousal and child support, which means I now have access to 40% of our combined income based on past years. It was a pretty significant change, and at first, it really stressed me out.

Luckily, I had some savings set aside, but I didn't feel like using them. So, I cut back on expenses instead.

I canceled my gym membership and all my subscriptions. I turned into the ultimate "no" person, telling my kids we couldn't go to Wendy's for dinner or go shopping at Target. When the kids were with their dad, I lived off what I had at home, like canned tuna and near-expired fruits and veggies, to save money on food.

I set aside my preconceived notions and plans.

I made those adjustments, but I was still holding onto my idea of the ideal life. I was stuck in a routine, wanting everything to be perfectly planned out. Looking back, I'm a bit ashamed, but I think I was even a bit snobbish about it. The thought of taking a different path felt really unpleasant, but I eventually realized that if I wanted to make my new life a reality, I'd have to be willing to step out of my comfort zone.

I used the creative space of my home.

Because I couldn't afford the monthly rent, I continued the business online and transformed my walk-out basement into a workspace. I hosted pop-up sales, allowing my loyal customers to shop from the basement area.

I also started renting out a space in our home (only to women, for safety reasons). I rent to traveling medical professionals and now host a college student. This rent pays for about a third of our mortgage payments. I explained to my kids that we had plenty of space, so we decided to host people who need to travel for work. I didn't make any money a priority when discussing it with them.

I began to explore possible career paths.

Although I was always working in some capacity, my job was viewed as a hobby that took a backseat to my husband's career ambitions. I sacrificed a lot of my early professional opportunities and career progression during my prime years, at the time, thinking it was a good trade-off for our family and home life. In retrospect, I realize this put me at a disadvantage as I had limited relevant work experience to draw on when I needed to rejoin the workforce later on.

I applied to a lot of jobs and started doing some part-time work on the side. I did freelance writing and started a paid newsletter on Substack about divorce that made several hundred dollars every month.

I turned down the unsuitable job offer

I eventually landed a full-time job in e-commerce, but I was offered to work in-person rather than remotely. The stable income was appealing, but I decided to pass on the opportunity because I didn't feel comfortable being away from my children even more often.

In the initial few months, I earned substantially more money than I would have if I had taken the original job.

I'd like to terminate spousal support payments before the scheduled end date.

I'm dealing with a contentious situation regarding spousal support as I navigate my post-divorce life. Right now, it's starting to feel like spousal support is causing more problems than solutions, so I'm working on getting out of these payments as soon as possible.

I'm not entirely sure what my life will look like without those payments. But over the past couple of years I've come to realize I can count on myself to support my family. I'd rather pay the financial cost and rely on my own judgment than deal with the tension that would come from arguing about the issue.

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